We have a very special guest coming to speak to my class: Danny Tanner himself, Bob Fucking Saget!! I love him so much, he’s so dirty! I snuck into his dressing room and ate the M&M’s they prepared for him and also sat in his chair I wanted to be alone with him before he showed up. Coach Cummings told me I needed to go but I’d do anything to fuck Bob Saget, that includes fucking another guy to get to Bob Saget. So I did what I had to do!